One ship sails East,
And another West,
By the self-same winds that blow,
'Tis the set of the sails
And not the gales,
That tells the way we go.

-- Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Have you ever wondered why you can’t seem to get through to your CEO? Ever wonder why you are not being heard; ever been frustrated with exchanges that left you feeling more behind rather than ahead?

Someone might say that you have a communication problem. You don’t. You have an orientation problem.

Leaders, such as yourselves, have sails that are set. Your CEO is not affected by the winds that blow their way, and no amount of hot air or arctic blasts you give them will make a difference.

You need to know how their sails are set.

All leaders want to get stuff done. That’s no secret. Generally speaking, your CEO leans towards one of three ways in getting it done: through pursuing big ideas, through achieving a lot of projects and through overcoming challenges.

One is about stimulus, the other about success, and the third is about strength. One needs to feel good, one needs to look good and the other needs to do good.

The beauty of knowing how your CEO has set their sail is that it doesn’t take a lot of work to work well with them; slight adjustments make for smooth sailing. So here are three reasons you are not getting through and how to change it overnight.

1. You are taking a person who loves ideas and you are trying to limit them to your way of seeing things.

The CEO who loves to be stimulated, who is highly energized by dreaming and starting, who is a great problem solver and can lift the mood of a team, cannot stand negativity, limitation and maintenance.

This CEO is fun; hard-work is not the issue, getting serious is not the issue, wanting it done is not the issue. The issue is how the work is done: positive, possibility and promising is their domain.

Not pain. For this CEO, problems are opportunities for creativity. Anything that seems to pull them into managing, maintaining or meeting the same issues time and again is a weight. The idea driven CEO does not like anchors.

If you are working for this CEO, there are two things you can do right away to get through to them. The first is to always bring options and questions. “We have a problem. We have some options. What else do you see here?”

The second approach with this CEO is to work with them clearly on how and when to get projects finished. The idea-driven CEO can be impulsive, chase shiny objects and shift directions. They will land on shore if they can see the shore, otherwise a distant star may draw them away.

The best question to ask yourself is, “How can I get them to think with me but not necessarily think like me?”

2. You are taking a person who loves success and getting in their way.

You may work for a CEO who is non-stop. They don’t seem to even take time to celebrate the win. They are quick to be on to the next thing. You know that they are efficient, love the recognition that comes from accomplishment, and avoid the look of failure at nearly all cost.

You admire this CEO because they know how to read and adapt to people, they will overcome obstacles and they are inspirational. You also know that they don’t like criticism, being made to look bad, and having their time wasted.

And that’s the big deal. This CEO sees any sign of incompetence, indecisiveness or inefficiency as a waste of their time.

If you want to get through to this CEO, do two things immediately:

• Be very clear on what success looks like to them and mirror it, message it, and move towards it.
• Be prepared and organized, and make sure communication pieces look good. Sloppiness, errors and inattention drive them crazy.

The best question to ask yourself is “What does it look like to be alongside them and in step with them?”

3. You are taking a person who likes to be in charge and not serving them.

If you work with a CEO who loves strength, who can be hyper-focused on a challenge and won’t let up until s(he) crushes it, then you are working with a person who has an innate sense of justice. S(h)e requires loyalty, and in turn will protect you and be quite magnanimous.

This CEO carefully structures their life and working conditions. They are direct, and though good of heart, can seem to speak without a filter. They are on the lookout for deception and threat.

With this CEO, things can seem to be coasting along, and then you will find yourself challenged or confronted by them. They will jerk your chain, subconsciously reminding you of who is in charge.

If you want to get through to them, do three things:

• Get on their side. Frame what you are trying to do as serving what you know that they care about. Do so genuinely, of course, because they detect manipulation. Whatever you are trying to “get through to them,” put it in the context of what they are trying to accomplish.
• Be direct. This CEO despises weakness. Never beat around the bush. Stand firm. If you know your stuff, they appreciate a good challenge.
• Do care. This CEO has a big heart. They are deeply touched by sincerity and thoughtfulness.

The best question to ask yourself is “How can I move forward within their structure and toward their cause?”

Whether your CEO likes to be stimulated, successful or strong, whether they are driven by ideas, accomplishments or challenges, you can relate to them and get through to them. You don’t have to try a lot of different things, just adjust a couple of things.

As the poet writes, “It’s the set of the sail and not the gale.”